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Taking My Own Advice

I am like so many people in the world--willing and able to dish out advice, but not so quick to take it. That was a lovely little message I posted this weekend. I knew the whole time that I was typing it that I desperately needed to take my own advice. I'm most certainly a control freak, convinced somewhere in the depths of my subconscious that I single-handedly affect the the rotation of the Earth...but I digress.

Yesterday I found myself in shopping hell—5:15 in a Wal-Mart standing with my 1 item in a 10-person long line. I did my usual dance...poked my head out of line and counted the number of items in each person's shopping cart/hands...wrote a few nasty letters to the manager in my head about how they need to convert the garden center cash register to a 10-item or less lane...cursed the people in front of me who apparently walked across the entire store for a gallon of milk and back just to get in front of me in line...fretted about whether or not I would be able to get ready in time to go to the concert we were planning to attend.

That's when it hit me. Did I really have any control here? Was I somehow responsible for the people in front of me? Would the concert be held up if I was late? Could I really stop the rotation of the Earth if something in my life was less than perfect? I saw in my head the first dip on the Kraken, remembered the thrill of succumbing to the laws of physics, and took a deep breath.

We made it to the concert, albeit during the second piece. I was so busy trying to find some seats, that I neglected to pick up a program. Just as I considered asking my neighbor for a peek at his, I realized the joy in the unknown. I had never before been to a concert where I really had no idea what I would hear next. This ended up being a fun game for me as I tried to name the composer in the first few measures. Okay, so it wasn't much fun at first. I did fidget in my seat until I realized it was just another "out of control" moment. I gave in and enjoyed the evening on a much deeper level.

The concert was a very special evening for me. I will post on it later after I process the events and put together something that will be more meaningful for the rest of the world.

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