Dejé mi diccionario en mi carro en los estados unidos. Y ahora no recuerdo como decir "leave" en espanol. Yo se esta palabra. Te prometo. Yo se la. Pero no la recuerdo ahora cuando necisito la usar. ***translation*** I left my dictionary. in my car in the United States. And now I cannot remember how to say "leave" in Spanish. I know the word. I promise you. I know it. But I cannot remember it now when I need to use it.

Do you see the way the wrinkles crease the corners of my mouth? Did you catch the edges raise into an imperfect, crescent--flesh colored? Can you find the light that sparkles and twinkles as it dances in my eyes? I swallowed a secret. It's mine. I'd like to share it with you, but I can't. I swallowed a secret. It's mine.

I want to be free of mistrust that shackles the heart and judgments that bind the soul. I want to explore and embrace what this life has to give me and follow the path that unfolds. I want to bask in my bliss, in my wonder of life and the beauty that is who I am. I want to be true to the me in the core of my depths that no one seems to understand.

Summer vacation has officially begun, and I was thinking today about how dangerous this unrestricted time can be. It will be a busy summer this year, filled with at least one trip out of the country, a rollercoaster weekend, another artists' retreat, Spanish class, rockstar photos, lots of writing, and a new running regimen. Oh, and my University of Florida graduate class. I've recently fallen for my first love all over again. Poetry. I'm reading it, writing it, listening to it, and talking about it. In English and Spanish. Ah. With that in mind, my plan this summer is to chronicle my days through poetry. We'll see how this turns out.

"This is my dream, and I'll decide where it goes from here." This is one of my favorite lines from the movie, "Alice in Wonderland." I finally saw it this afternoon, and it resonated with me. Actually, much of what's happened to me in the last week has resonated with me like this. It's exciting...and a bit frustrating. It's no secret that I've been ensconced in the Spanish language lately. My Peru trip has necessitated this. For the last six months, I have watched many, many movies in Spanish, listened to a lot of Spanish music, and tried to communicate in the language whenever possible. I know that every other word out of my mouth has been related to Spanish. I get it. I was out on the lawn mower this afternoon listening to "Como Lo Tienes Tu" and thinking about some of the comments I've heard lately about my entertainment habits. Seriously, why does anyone care what I do in my spare time? However, in the middle of my internal rant...

Sunday night, after the sun set, I found myself in my front yard with Winnipeg. Something snapped under my feet, and I started running as fast as I could...wearing flip flops. And it felt so good to feel my legs push my body forward as my feet touched and lifted off the ground. My lungs filled with air. Good air that they have been craving. I felt like I was flying. Dogs are the perfect companion for such random moments, and she jumped right into the game. She's a faster runner than I am, and she can be a bit frightening to watch barreling forward because you think she won't stop. But she usually does. I'm still smiling at the thought of me and my dog running like maniacs in the front yard. As fast as we could. And laughing loudly. And not caring who might have seen it. Feet touch ground. Lift off. Pushes me forward. Flying. Lungs fill with air. Exhale. Pushes me forward. Satiated. Legs jump in the night. Dodges. Pushes me forward. Delight. Here there is no finish line. We ...