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Showing posts from December, 2006

Reflections on 2006

At some point near the end of December, I chronicle some of the major events of the passing year. I've been doing this since I was 13, and although it still seems a little hokey to me, I'll do this again for 2006. I started 2006 as a completely different person than the one sitting before my computer now typing these random thoughts. I speak my mind more (although still not enough). I've stood up for myself by saying no to people I love and refusing to eat potato chips just because they were "there". I actually purchased...and wore...and took a picture in a sleeveless shirt. I saw both the emergency room and Cancun during the middle of the night (and they both make fascinating stories). I started a whole new year of teaching and finally realized that it's not my calling. I learned that people are human just like me, and that it's okay to open up to them. In that vein, I've cultivated some amazing friendships with some truly wonderful women. I've se

On Numbness

I have very little to write. I've had very little to write for several days now. My journal is collecting dust. The keyboard is feeling neglected. I'm mostly feeling numb these days. I've been on my personal discovery journey long enough to know that "numbing out" is my way of dealing with the crap swirling around me. It's an instinctual response to chaos in my life...and my life is filled to the brim with chaos. I'm also a little weary. I'm weary of this world and all it's messages. I don't need a life filled with physical and emotional baubles. I feel like I spend too much of my time running around--filling my car with purchases I don't really need; speaking words I don't really need to say; shoveling food into my already full stomach; infusing my brain with sitcom jokes; and grading a 3-inch stack of papers for students who will check out the grade and toss it in the nearest recycle bin. The band is falling apart. My summer pants don

Struggling Artist

You know it's never a good sign when even writing is a chore for me. I woke up at 5:00 this morning, opened one of my book files, and attempted to write. The words were all jumbled up on the page. Thoughts were incoherent. It was too much of a struggle, so I gave up and crocheted 15 circles. So I'm in a crummy mood, which is always a sign that I'm ignoring my soul, but nothing is working. I can't even go for the run I feel like I really need because I need new running shoes and the iPod battery is dead. :( One of my newest projects is a photography journal. I forget where I read about it, but the idea is to take one picture each day that represents something significant about that day for you. I'm not sure I'll ever actually take one picture a day, but I'm attempting. I thought I'd post some recent pictures that made me giggle inside in the hopes that I will rekinder some of those feelings. This is the most artistic thing I can seem to do right now. (Oth