Skip to main content

To Risk or Not To Risk

"Keep an eye out for the local hotel when you get into town. You're gonna get a kick out of it." My husband had a lovely smirk on his face that told me I was in for a treat.

He knows me all too well. I'm a sucker for anything that smacks of small town America. I pulled into the tiny farm town in the middle of nowhere Florida. All around me, I saw signs of life that you cannot find in well-manicured, gated communities. Box houses lined the streets in an array of colors. Kid paraphrenalia, saint statues, and lawn chairs adorned the yards. Women and children and men lined the sidewalks on foot and bikes.

Glimpses of poverty surrounded me. So did a sense of life that you cannot find just anywhere. Families and friends share meals and long conversations. They have one goal: make a life out of what they have. They know what matters: holding on relationships. There are no homeowner's associations sending out letters because a basketball net is in the driveway or the grass is one inch higher than it should be. Instead, you find people sharing what they have and protecting what they hold dear.

I found my soul there. I want this job. It's mine, but I have to decide between this one and another place that is closer to home and doesn't require me driving down a rather dangerous two lane highway. Logically, I should go with the closer one, but my heart is pleading with me to take the risk and invest my time in the tiny, backwards, poverty-stricken area.

Sometimes decisions don't make logical sense. This one certainly doesn't, but it's getting more difficult to drown out the cries of my soul with the hammer of reason. For now, I'm thinking. And praying. And considering all the possibilities. And hoping that the right thing to do will rise above the discourse.

Comments

Christy said…
Mmmmmm. It's so easy to talk big about taking risks until you're faced with a real one. I'll be praying that God guides you in the right direction!

Popular posts from this blog

Pardon the Interruption

It's 10:00. My race clothes are laying across the top of the dog crate. I've already consumed my all-natural sleep aid. The alarm is set for 4:45 in the morning. I should be sleeping, but my mind is spinning at an unnatural rate. Remember this poem ? The subject of that poem married just a few weeks ago, and I just finished looking through his wedding photos. It's a strange feeling. Not one of loss. Or Regret. Or even wistfulness. I'm thoroughly happy for both of them in a way that will seriously not make sense to most of the people I know. I suppose there will always be an odd sense of knowing in a situation like this. I know the feel of those lips. I've seen that look in his eyes. What I felt for him was real and pure and drives the feeling of satisfaction that is currently overwhelming me. I love knowing that he's in love--even if it's not with me. I even saved my favorite photo to my computer because the image stirred something in me that needs to be sti...

On Muchness

A dear friend confessed to me last night that he had lost his muchness and found it again. I confessed the same and even admitted the ridiculous series of events that recently sapped my own muchness. That little confession seemed to do wonders. It's so easy to fall out of step with myself. In fact, I do it quite naturally. Growing up in a Christian home, I took to heart the instructions to love my neighbor more than I love myself. Oh, wait! I just checked the scripture. "Love your neighbor as yourself." I may have been doing this the wrong way. I ended 2010 with the resolution that I would no longer make decisions out of fear. I am starting 2011 with the resolution to make decisions based on what I want. I've struggled with this because I've always believed that I should consider the needs and wants of others before my own. I'd like to think this is a valiant approach, but the truth is that it only leads to martyrdom...and I don't think I was given the opp...

TMI and Tidal Waves

As usual, it's been a busy week around these parts, and none of my activities this week involved running. If my grandmother could hear at the moment and complete a sentence without hacking up a lung, she'd ask me what's wrong. I'd have to confess that my eczema has flared up in this oh-so-cold-there's-ice-on-my-car south Florida weather, and my skin is so itchy that I have bruises up and down my limbs from all the scratching I've been doing. There are some days I'm relieved to know men with calloused hands. (Before you take that last comment too seriously, remind yourself that I am writing this at 9:30 on a Friday night.) Anyway... I met up for coffee with someone last night who proved to stoke my creative juices. I'll spare you the details of the conversation, but I did have to stop him mid sentence to point out that that particular conversation will most definitely become part of "La Isla Encontrada." Fortunately, he agreed to it, and I fully...