Skip to main content

Swim Suit Season

I've really been craving some Cool Cafe Blues coffee from Barnie's, and I set out to the one Barnies store in town. It just happens to be at an outlet mall, so I did my usual stop in Gap Outlet (love that store) and then popped in to the swim suit shop.

I'm not picky about swimsuits. Right now I'm wearing a pair of boardshorts with a tankini top to the beach. That's perfectly fine with me, but the top is really a size too big. Every time I go in the water, I end up with breasts floating around OUTSIDE MY TOP. Getting out of the water intact takes this whole procedure that involves contorting and pulling and...well, it makes me feel like I have OCD.

So as I was trying on a brown with aqua polka dots skirt/suit, I noticed a little poster on the wall. It was some sort of guide for finding the perfect suit for your body. You know, if you have a bulging stomach, look for this or long torso, look for that.

That's great if you have just one body issue. I don't think I'd even care about hiding just one body issue. What the hell are you supposed to do if you have a bulging stomach, wide hips, overflowing breasts, and large thighs ALL AT THE SAME TIME?

For now, I'm still in the same too big top. Please, out of sake for my dignity, avert your eyes if you see me swimming toward shore.
Labels:

Comments

Christy said…
Ha! I know what you mean! I always wondered how something that doesn't even cover your thighs can "minimize" them!
1:05 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Carnival

It's a beautiful Saturday afternoon here in southwest Florida, although still a bit too warm for my November tastes. I'm learning to enjoy my weekends with as much unstructured and unscheduled time as possible. Last Saturday was a delightful unstructured day. A new friend of mine (the one from the Everglades excursion) and I went to a local carnival. Now, here's the thing...I LOVE carnivals. The food. The people. The rides. The lights. I can easily spend an entire day wandering through the crowds. He's no carnival slouch. The first thing we did was walk through the entire place, scoping out the rides. Then the fun began. We rode almost every ride there (except for the kiddie attractions and the broken Tornado). The Wild Claw. The Scrambler. The Orbiter. The Space Oddysey. The Swings. The Pharaoh's Fury. The Ferris Wheel. The Giant Slide. The Haunted House. The Avalanche. It was all good. How can you top a ride that uses centrifugal force to plaster your body against...
2 comments
Read more

Busy Days Ahead

It's been a busy week for me. I left my house at 4:30 Monday morning for my drive down south and pulled back in my driveway at 1:20 this morning. The days have been long, too, between working at the new school from 7:30 until 3:00 or 4:00 and then working at the new place until 9:00 or 10:00 each night. I now have callouses on my fingers and not one intact finger nail. I think I've also developed a new twitch somewhere on my face. One afternoon this week, I stood in the middle of our new living room and took in the sight of missing drywall, a growing hole in the floor and soaked up my husband's predictions that we still won't be ready to paint by the weekend. All I wanted to do was cry. All I felt was nothingness. Numbness. Anyone who has ever reached the point of numbness knows that it's scarier than feeling like you're falling apart. It's one step beyond feeling like you're falling apart. I couldn't help but wonder just what we had gotten ourselves...
5 comments
Read more

Stranger Obligations

I had to make a few difficult decisions this week. At least, they were difficult for me. I wish I could be the kind of person who completely makes decisions based on his/her own needs and wants and boldly moves through life with unabashed freedom from how our choices affect others. But I'm not built like that. I had placed an ad for my former stray. I felt like it was time to find her a more permanent home because so much in my life right now is uncertain. One person answered the ad, but she did not seem like a good fit, and I gave up further thought. This week I received another response. As long as this person is telling the truth, it's an ideal situation for the dog. Yet, I had a strange feeling and could not sort out whether or not it was my intuition kicking in or that fact that I actually like the dog and don't want to see her go. In the end, I decided that it was in my own (and my Winnipeg's) best interest for her to stay with us through the summer. (I seri...
5 comments
Read more